Ribs, Anyone?

Genesis is often called "the book of firsts," so it makes sense for us to turn to Genesis to see what God had in mind when he invented marriage. In doing so, we're in good company; the Genesis account is quoted by both Jesus and the apostle Paul as the foundation for an understanding of Christian marriage.

In Genesis chapters 1 and 2 we read the account of Creation. God created all matter, light, and life and declared that everything he made was "very good." Then God made man in his own image, and we discover the first "not good" in Scripture: "The LORD God said, 'It is not good for man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him'" (Genesis 2:18).

Commenting on this passage, Scott Stanley, in his book A Lasting Promise, makes a very interesting point. He notes that this "not good" in God's eyes "came before sin and even prior to the relationship of Adam and Eve." Says Stanley, "There was no sin, no fall, and there were no con­sequences of these. Still, it was not good for man to be alone. Why? Simply because God created us for relationships—with him, in marriage, and with others."

The Bible tells us that God paraded all the beasts and the birds before Adam to see what he would name them. But Adam was not impressed. Genesis 2:20 strikes me as funny: "So the man gave names to all the livestock, the birds of the air and all the beasts of the field. But for Adam no suitable helper was found." Perhaps lonely Adam blushed at that point and said, "No thanks, that's not what I had in mind!"

I can imagine Adam chatting with God about his situation. "It's not that I'm ungrateful or have anything against animals," he says. "I just need someone who is like me but different. Someone who is sexy, sweet, submissive, and sensitive to all my needs. Someone who is beautiful but not bossy."
"You know, Adam," God responds, "something like that will cost you an arm and a leg."
To which Adam replies, "What could I get for a rib?"

Well, maybe that conversation never took place. But Doctor God did put Adam to sleep, took out one of his ribs, and closed him back up. Then God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of man and presented her to Adam. And in Eve—not anywhere else in creation—Adam found the fulfillment of his unmet needs.

Since God made Adam from the dust of the earth, it might seem logical that Eve would have: been made from dust too. But God had a better plan. By deciding to create Eve out of Adam's rib, he demonstrated two critical things: First, the woman is to walk beside the man, not in back of him or in front of him. This means that on the first day of marriage for the first couple, God debunked male chauvinism and liberal feminism in one swoop. These should be non-issues for Christians in covenant.

Second, by making Eve from Adam, God emphasized the closeness of the special relationship between husband and wife. Man completes woman and woman completes man. As Benjamin Franklin once said, "It is the man and woman united that makes the complete human being.. .together they are more likely to succeed in the world." The two are part of each other and belong to each other in an intimate companionship that is infinitely closer than all other relationships. I like the poetic description Robin Williams’ character gives in the movie Patch Adams: "So close that when your hand is on my chest, it is my hand. So close that when you close your eyes, I fall asleep."

As an old rabbi once said, "God chose a rib from Adam's side, not a bone from Adam's head that she would be over him, or a bone from his foot that she would be under him, but from his side that she would be next to him, from under his arm that he might protect her, and from next to his heart that he might love her." Pastor and author David Jeremiah sums it up this way: "The man is restless while he misses the rib that was taken out of his side. The woman is restless until she gets under man's arm from where she was taken. It is humbling to the woman to know that she was created for the man, but it is to her glory to know that she alone can com­plete him. Likewise it is humbling to the man to know that he is incom­plete without the woman, but it is to his glory to know that the woman was created for him."

Clearly, the Genesis account shows us that marriage, as designed by God, is a covenant of companionship in which two people become linked in body, soul, and mind. They become, as Genesis 2:24 says, "one flesh." They complete each other and give themselves to each other in a compan­ionship that fills the void in their lives and provides for ultimate happiness and fulfillment. It is the ultimate friendship.